Part of a series: The new world of the working mom
As the global inclusion and impact officer at advertising, marketing and PR agency Ogilvy, Tope Ajala is a driving force for
But her own experience of becoming a mom two years ago quickly exposed major gaps in
"We've normalized mothers who jump straight back into work [after having a baby] without acknowledging our brains aren't the same, our bodies aren't the same," Ajala says. "I say to my team, and I talk about it publicly online too, 'I'm not the same person that left to go on
Ajala's experience inspired her to look more closely at Ogilvy's benefits and make sure women getting ready to have children know they have the company's — and her — support.
"I look at the policies we have a little bit more granularly," she says. "I speak to every mother that's about to go out on maternity leave, not from a space of, 'Here's what you have to do and all the things you have to know,' but more like, 'I've been here, what do you need?' I wish someone had come to me and said, 'As a mom, these are all the tools and resources you have available.'"
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Becoming a mom has made her a better leader, Ajala says. She dismisses the notion that women have to choose between motherhood and ambition, and says businesses should recognize what skills and devotion working moms tend to bring to the table.
"Motherhood doesn't shrink you, it grows you, especially as a leader," she says. "Businesses have to incorporate that in how we are taking care of our employees who are mothers."
Ajala shares why she decided to lend her voice to the challenges working mothers face, how her professional life has been impacted and her unapologetic approach to work-life balance.
Why did you feel it was so important to speak out about mothers needing better support in the workplace?
I just thought I was always going to be a career woman — motherhood wasn't in the picture. Then I got pregnant, and when I came back I was like, I don't know if I'm the same person; who can I speak to about this? And to find out [no one talks about this] was heartbreaking. I needed to change that.
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How has motherhood enhanced your leadership style?
Motherhood refined me into a more emotionally intelligent leader. While I'm logical, I'm also empathetic. I'm encouraging people to normalize visibility as a parent, to talk about how that drives change within the business.
I've always said the best leaders are the most empathetic and the most vulnerable ones. I have an open-door policy, but something shifted, because two years ago, I don't think people would have come to me with some of the concerns and challenges they had. Now, it's 'Hey, we don't have enough lactation rooms. Can we get more lactation rooms on every floor?' And as a mother, [I say,] 'Yes!' It becomes normal, and we need to normalize parenting as being visible versus this thing we hide because we work.
How has being a mom influenced your professional ambition?
I've always been ambitious, but I think you look at the world differently. I'm sure a lot of mothers can relate — you look at the world through care, because now whatever you put out into the world directly impacts your child. So my ambition grew, because I needed to not just safeguard future mothers, but I needed to create a world that my child can be proud of. I need this company to be successful. I need the work that I do to be visible. I need her to one day Google me and ask, 'What did Mom stand for?'
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How are you able to consistently be your best self at work and at home?
I tell people, I will always be there when you need me; I can't be there when you want me. Everyone wants me, and if I'm there when everyone wants me, I'm not my full self. Being that vulnerable with friends and family has allowed for them to truly understand the amount that is on my plate, and only tap into me when they truly need me. That's shifted the guilt of wanting to spend time with everyone and not spending any time with yourself, and that's been beautiful. My friends and family are absolutely amazing. They respect it, and they just say, 'You know what? I'm going to take on that policy.'
From a working standpoint, I also show a level of vulnerability on calls. I work in the West Coast, but I work East Coast hours because my job is global, and sometimes my daughter will come and sit on my lap while I take the call, and I will never apologize for it. Oftentimes mothers apologize because they think they're doing something wrong. I just say to everyone on the call, 'We have a future leader joining us,' and it breaks the ice. I want people to understand that, as a mom, I can't separate care and ambition. Why? Because I care about my work, but I care about being a mother. Those two things are often connected, and people don't see enough because we don't see vulnerable leaders. It's essential to let people know that you can't separate care and ambition, because both are essential for success.
